Like you, for most of my life I equated my sexuality with my presentation and my behavior. I didn’t realize that my bisexuality was innate to my being, regardless of what I wore, who I hung out with, or how I behaved. When my first wife got pregnant, I decided that I’d gotten the queerness out of my system. From then on, I promised myself, I’d be the straight husband, father, and family provider.

That seems to be the confusion here… that you thought if you stopped taking action on your same sex attraction and acted like a “good girl” and a faithful wife that your bisexual inclinations no longer mattered.

Hopefully, you’ve come to grips with the truth of your bisexuality, that it’s who you are, not what you do.