Kissing Jessica Stein has long been one of my favorite rom coms. First, because of the irresistible quirkiness of the main characters, their sexual chemistry, and their sparkling banter. But also because the movie doesn't conclude with a typical happily-ever-after rom-com ending. It's far more complex and nuanced than that, like real life. And, yet, it's still a happy ending, as both leads demonstrate so much self-realization and growth.

And, although it's only been of late that I've come to understand that sexual orientation is about who I am and not so much about what I do, I think I've always understood that the reason Helen and Jessica don't end up together is less about where they fall on the the sexual orientation spectrum and more about their individual sex drives. Helen has a need for passionate, frequent, hot sex, while Jessica is less sexual (or, perhaps, still harbors some hang-ups that prohibit her from breaking through unseen barriers). I'm always left with the hope that she will find her more sexual self in the future.

Regardless, I've revisited this delightful film numerous times and find myself loving it more with each viewing. Thanks for this wonderful article!